Monthly Archives: August 2017

Beam Me Up – I’m Here To Help

I knew on the Thursday morning, it would be Alan’s last day on this earth.  His feet were stone cold, his breathing was very labored, and his complexion was red and sweaty.  The haunting Scottish pipes echoed throughout the house.  My friend Jacqueline had returned to the house in the morning to give me moral ... Read More

Wednesday, 25th April 2012

I’d read the leaflets on death that Hospice had given me, so I knew what to expect – the labored breathing, the ruddy, sweaty complexion and the cold feet.  So I was constantly checking Alan for any of these signs. Each night I was barely sleeping, waiting, watching, listening I’d promised my dear man I ... Read More


Thankfully the Scottish Minister called; I explained that Alan was very close to death and we wanted to renew our Marriage Vows and he immediately came out on the Tuesday morning.   We sat chatting for a while, and being a typical Scotsman (complete with kilt) he soon brought some levity to our conversation, particularly ... Read More


Several people have inquired about  my phrase “penny dropped”   from this link    This is actually an English phrase, meaning  “If the penny drops, you suddenly understand something” Part of the history of this is British public toilets in 1939 required users to ‘spend a penny‘ in order to unlock the door to ... Read More


One particularly difficult morning, Alan was highly agitated and very shaky, I tried to get him into the shower but he could barely stand, he no longer had any strength in his legs, and I was worried he would fall.    I didn’t push the point, instead I suggested he go back and snuggle down ... Read More

“Whose That Little Girl?”

Alan didn’t seem to mind sleeping in the hospital bed, I always tried to lay alongside him on top of his bed for a short while, just snuggling up to him  before he went to sleep just to give him, and me, comfort.  Then I would move over into my single bed,  it just seemed ... Read More


Anyone who know’s me, will tell you I’m a very private person.  You ask, why then is she revealing such intimate details about her husband’s journey with Alzheimers?  I must admit, I thought long and hard about this, and as painful as it is for me to record my memories, the answer is simple – ... Read More


Lucy brought me so much pleasure and comfort during this time; our days seemed to be grinding to a halt, but I did my best to push all negative thoughts from my mind – “three weeks to live” –  I was in a surreal world. I was determined to enjoy each precious moment with my ... Read More